First you have to understand why exactly the limits are being crossed. Talk to your child to make sure your limits are reasonable and needed. Sometimes parents want their kids do something just because it is accepted that way. They don’t care of child’s personal needs and wishes. Maybe your child is actually right and you are the one who is not reasonable and who should chance the behavior.
Of course most of the time children disobey just because they are pushing the limits. They just want to play and don’t want any duties and restrictions. Also grownups sometimes don’t want to something, but they have stronger sense of responsibility.
Children just don’t know about the consequences of not doing something. In this case you first should have an opened talk and explain why it is so important to do the duties and behave. If that is not working you should really think of some punishments. For example, don’t buy your children something that he wants to show there is some consequences.
But punishment alone won’t give the results. You must make sure your child really understands why he got punished. After that you must have and opened, caring talk. This conversation can’t be formal and cold. Go close to your child, put the arm on his shoulder and explain why he got punished. He must clearly see the connection between pushing the limits and not getting what he wants.
If that is not helping there are probably some more serious reasons for your child’s behavior. Maybe he is trying to prove something or just wants your attention. Sometimes even punishments and yelling are what children want, because it is the only way how t get any attention and affection from parents. You must emphasize. Think like your child. Think what would be these reasons. Maybe it is your own fault, because you don’t see what your child actual needs are.
If you can’t figure out the reasons of your child’s behavior by yourself, you should search for a help from professional child psychotherapist. Probably he will have experienced lot of complicated cases and will know why your child is pushing the limits after you have tried everything. He will know how to talk to your child to find the actual reasons.
In the conclusion we want to say that there is no such thing as bad children, only wrong parenting and lack of understanding. You must find the actual reasons not just yell and put unreasonable punishments. That won’t give any effect, only will make your child feel bad and willing to push the limits even more.